Number 6 Brentford – My Man United

editorial

Are you ready for Erik ten Transfers?

After an unusually quiet spell on United’s transfer front, this week the rumour mill has gone into overdrive. Adrien Rabiot, Marko Arnautovic, Guido Rodriguez, Sergej Milikovic-Savic (an ever-present), Fabian Ruiz, Benjamin Sesko, Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, Sasa Kalajdzic, Cody Gakpo and, of course, Frenkie de Jong are all doing the rounds.

What’s unusual about these rumours, however, is that most of them have come from pretty reliable sources – the likes of The Athletic’s David Ornstein or transfer gurus Gianluca Di Marzio and Fabrizio Romano. Usually when they are involved, there’s no smoke without fire, so if that’s the case, what exactly are United playing at?

Many people are condemning United for a lack of strategy and a lack of ambition in the transfers being reported. We are reminded of the infamous Ighalo transfer window of 2020, which was probably the most blatant example of panic buying ever seen in football. But maybe there is a more optimistic explanation for what John Murtough and co. are up to here.

By the very number of names being discussed, the first thought is we are not going to buy all of them. If we have really bid on De Jong, Ruiz, Rabiot and Rodriguez, for example, we clearly don’t intend to follow through on every bid. A bid does not inevitably lead to a deal, even if it is accepted. United are getting their ducks in a row. Plan A, Plan B, Plan C, Plan D and Plan E for midfielders and a similar number of plans for forwards.

The players who the club is being criticised for bidding on, Arnautovic (now withdrawn) and Rabiot, could be the Plan Z’s of the two categories for all we know.

And by the same token, if that is the case, there could be some really exciting names in Plan B, and Plan C (or even Plan A in the case of strikers), who we do not even know about and who have so far managed to escape the beady eye of Ornstein and co.

If so, we could be in for a very interesting end to the window. You never know, we may even end up with those 10 transfers that Ralf Rangnick predicted. Stranger things have happened.

Obviously, an opening day home defeat to Brighton wasn’t the start to the season any of us wanted. But even Sir Alex Ferguson took time to build a successful team. Erik ten Hag will have learned a lot from the game and it’s what he does with that knowledge that’s important. And the fact that there will almost certainly be more transfers will help, too.

That focus on the future is a common theme running through this issue. By learning from history United can move on and get back to where we know we belong, as our main feature articles point out so clearly. After all, we are Manchester United. No club in the world knows better than us how to come back from adversity.

Latest united news

The top news stories about United this week, handpicked for you. Clicking on any headline will open the full story from The Peoples Person in a new window. See the dedicated transfers page for more transfer news.

Barcelona declare Frenkie de Jong's contract null and void

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Aubameyang offered to United and Chelsea

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Paul Scholes blasts McFred after dismal Brighton showing

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United in talks for Guido Rodriguez

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Charlie Wellens secures Crewe loan deal

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Roy Keane begs United to back Ten Hag

SEEING DOUBLE DUTCH

There’s a new face at the helm, but the feeling is all too familiar

A new Dutch manager replaced a coach clearly out of his depth over the summer and his preseason featured impressive wins, including over one of last season’s Champions League finalists. The Red Devils showcased a modern tactical style, focused on winning the ball in good areas and keeping it well under pressure out on tour.

Wrapping up their warmup games against Spanish opposition at Old Trafford last week, the new boss enjoyed a fantastic reception, which was repeated before the afternoon kick off on opening day weekend. Despite their preferred striker being ruled out through injury, United had plenty of reason to feel optimistic going into the new season.

Against them were a side who had barely been in the top-flight for half a decade but had earned a place as the second-favourite team of many Premier League supporters with their positive brand of football. Led by a young English manager, the underdogs visited having never recorded a victory at Old Trafford.

That record was undone by half time.

United dominated the ball, holding the lion’s share of possession, but around the half-hour mark they were behind. Although they managed to score in the second half, there was a clear lack of penetration, eventually leading to a depressing 2-1 home defeat to raise the curtain under the new boss. Although there were two debutants, in many ways it was a case of ‘different system, same players,’ with individual errors punctuating the plan every bit as much as it had last year in a historically poor season.

Perhaps the new boss simply needs greater backing in the transfer market? With so much of the ball and so little goal threat, an attacker would certainly be a sensible addition.

Radamel Falcao is available, isn’t he? Wait, what year is it?

Oh… Marko Arnautovic then?

Of course some of these 2014- 2022 parallels are just surface level: two men are Dutch, so what? Some, like the fact that both Louis van Gaal and Erik ten Hag handed out two debuts each are just weird little coincidences – spooky, maybe, but hardly worth drawing conclusions from.

But there are some parallels that seem more than a little bit concerning. The positive preseason performances that fracture on contact with Premier League football, the historic defeat to follow a historically poor season, the dour transfer window that promises a late scramble – these are all genuine concerns.

Ten Hag’s tactical outline may differ from Van Gaal’s in a number of ways, but it may encounter some of the same issues United’s former Dutch boss faced nonetheless – susceptibility to fast transitions and an inability to make possession count among them. These will be issues he must address.

What is perhaps most worrying is the recruitment. In both cases, the managers were announced well before their official appointment, and yet in each case those above them have little to show for the extra planning time afforded to them.

Louis was given players he had first hand experience with as well, but it seems clear that the targets he ended up with were well down his list. As for the current manager, we can only hope that he has seen something from his employers to suggest that the likes of John Murtough and Richard Arnold have learnt lessons from their predecessors, too.

Meet the opposition: BRENTFORD

Christian Eriksen’s return comes early and the pressure is already on.

Meet the opposition: brentford

Christian Erikson’s return comes early and the pressure is already on.

One to watch: JOSH DASILVA

Dasilva only managed 252 Premier League minutes last term due to what could have been a career-ending hip injury. He looks set to take on a more prominent role this time around. Dasilva has already staked a claim for a starting position on Saturday by scoring the magnificent equaliser in Brentford’s 2-2 draw with Leicester. He started his career as a striker in Arsenal’s youth system, but Thierry Henry talked him into a midfield role – a role the 23-year-old has the potential to excel in.

New Signing: Aaron Hickey

Hickey signed from Bologna in a deal worth £15m at the start of July. He initially impressed during his two-year Serie A spell during which he made 47 appearances. The two-footed Scotsman is comfortable in either full back position, although he played on the right in Brentford’s opener against Leicester. With a wealth of experience at just 20 years of age, he is certainly one to look out for, and has even featured for the senior Scotland side despite fierce competition at full back.

Squad page - opponents' official site (opens in new tab)

Head-to-head record with United (opens in new tab)

match preview

All the latest information about the upcoming game.

Team News and Predicted XI

Manchester United’s performance against Brighton will probably have given Erik ten Hag a few doubts around a couple of players who he may have thought would be safe options in preseason.

Diogo Dalot had a poor game, but he is unlikely to be replaced due to a lack of viable options, with Aaron Wan-Bissaka unsuited to possession football and subject to interest from Crystal Palace.

Scott McTominay also had a torrid time against Moises Caicedo and was arguably lucky to stay on the pitch after his high challenge on the Ecuadorian. A reconfiguration in midfield could well be on the cards, but Brentford’s aerial threat from set pieces may keep McTominay in the team. At this stage, we’ve gone with an optimistic attacking set up.

Luke Shaw may not have been awful, but his inability to keep hold of Pascal Gross for both goals and the fact that he now has genuine competition at left back could see him rotated out as well.

Despite his inclusion in our graphic, Anthony Martial has not returned to training so Cristiano Ronaldo should take his place. Given Ten Hag’s comments about the team performing better with Eriksen deeper after bringing on a striker, it would be no surprise to see the Portuguese recalled early while Martial continues his recovery.

De Gea and the central defensive pairing are likely to remain, although Lisandro Martinez could be a concern against the towering Ivan Toney.

The wide forward positions will surely be kept by Marcus Rashford and Jadon Sancho.

Tactical Analysis

In his post-match interview against Brighton, Erik ten Hag bemoaned his team’s inability to deal with the opposition’s surprising “long-ball” tactics as they failed to win second balls.

There will be no excuse concerning a surprise element against Brentford, however.

Nobody is calling them the new Burnley just yet, and they are a side that can play on the deck at times, but Thomas Frank does have his team playing an abrasive style of football, built on direct passes and physicality as they look to put the ball ‘into the mixer’ wherever possible.

In their season opener against Leicester on Sunday, Brentford played 60 long balls and 16 crosses – most of them hopeful.

One such direct play led the Brentford’s first goal, with Ivan Toney brushing his marker aside to control for an easy finish. He was at the back post to narrowly miss a header moments later.

And while it was a marvellous bit of play from Josh Dasilva to get the equaliser, Brentford’s primary threat is their willingness to go long and fight for whatever drops.

Ten Hag spent his summer implementing a man-oriented pressing game that challenges opponents to play the ball into space, and they will need to implement it far better here than they did against Brighton if they are to cope with Brentford’s physicality.

One potential area United could exploit is Aaron Hickey at right back. While clearly a talented young player, the Scot struggled in his first Premier League match, ceding possession 12 times and winning none of his duels (aerial or ground) before his withdrawal on 84^th minute.

Marcus Rashford’s role under Erik ten Hag looks somewhat similar to his use of Antony at Ajax, in that he often hangs wide on the touchline to receive diagonal passes in enough space to isolate his opposing fullback.

That kind of move could be crucial in unlocking a defence desperate to avoid the dreaded “second-season syndrome” that has felled many a Premier League new boy.

Video: Manager's Press conference (when available) (opens MANUTD.COM in new tab)

Report: MANAGER'S PRESS CONFERENCE (when available) (opens THEPEOPLESPERSON.COM in new tab)

Match officials

Referee: Stuart Attwell. Assistants: Marc Perry, Eddie Smart. Fourth official: Anthony Taylor. VAR: Paul Tierney. Assistant VAR: Gary Beswick.

ARE LOAN DEALS THE ROAD TO NOWHERE?

So many academy graduates head out on loan, never to be seen again.

Here’s a question: how many United academy stars can you name who came back from loan deals to become first team regulars?

Dean Henderson has come close. James Garner might just do it. Then perhaps we are going back to the likes of Danny Welbeck and Tom Cleverly (never really nailed-on starting XI regulars). Jonny Evans perhaps, who went to Antwerp.

Are we really only talking David Beckham, Jesse Lingard and John O’Shea?

Look at the litany of players who seemed like the best thing since sliced bread, only to return a year (or two, or three) later having made little or no progress at all. Tahith Chong, Axel Tuanzebe, Andreas Pereira, Amad, Facundo Pellistri, Brandon Williams, Joel Pereira, Fosu-Mensah, Borthwick Jackson, Demi Mitchell, Ravel Morrison, Fraizer Campbell, the list seems endless.

What is the problem? Do United send their youngsters out at the wrong age? Do they choose the wrong clubs to send them to? Are the youth scouts failing to find genuine talent, or keeping too many also-rans for too long?

Alvaro Fernandes is off to follow in Beckham’s footsteps at Preston. He is such a talent and you would expect to hear of him tearing it up in the Championship and being so head-and-shoulders better than the rest of the league that he walks straight back in to United’s first team next season. And yet, experience tells us to expect him to struggle to play regularly for Preston, possibly make a loan club change in January, and then return next summer a year older and wiser but not a better player than when he left.

Zidane Iqbal, a breath of fresh air on the pre-season tour, Hannibal, Shola Shoretire, Charlie Savage, Alejandro Garnacho … some of them will also be sent off to pastures new. How many will fulfil their potential?

And what of Amad, Pellistri, Chong and Garner … another year on loan? If it didn’t work the first time, what makes United think it will work this time?

Brandon Williams, now 21, is also expected to go back out on loan this season. What is the point? If he is not good enough even to be the second choice in his position now, then sell him. The same goes for Chong (22) and Tuanzebe (24).

When you consider players that were kept at the club rather than loaned out, you find a much better success rate. Marcus Rashford, Scott McTominay, Anthony Elanga, Mason Greenwood, Adnan Januzaj (only went on loan after breaking into the first team), Wes Brown, Giggs, Scholes, Fletcher, Butt, the Neville brothers …

It’s about time United took a long hard look at the development strategy for players emerging from the academy.

Loan deals, with the odd exception, don’t seem to work. Keeping players at the club seems to be the better policy.

Of course, you could argue that the reason the success rate is higher for those kept at United is that the club tends to keep the really exceptional talents. Well, OK, but in that case, reduce the contract length of the other ones. Let them move on sooner. Don’t hang on to them for five, six years, holding them back from finding a more realistic path.

Accepted, there is logic to keeping them on the books. Their salaries are trivial compared to the potential value if they do become a Premier League standard star. But that is not really fair on the player, and it gets in the way of a smooth transition for the next generation coming through.

Let’s see the likes of Garnacho, Iqbal, Hannibal, Savage and Shoretire join the first team squad this season. With new Premier League rules allowing five subs per game, there has never been a better opportunity to introduce youngsters into the first team and see what they can do.

Let’s face it, the strategy has to change.

ARE LOAN DEALS THE ROAD TO NOWHERE?

So many academy graduates head out on loan, never to be seen again.

Here’s a question: how many United academy stars can you name who came back from loan deals to become first team regulars?

Are we really only talking David Beckham, Jesse Lingard and John O’Shea?

And what of Amad, Pellistri, Chong and Garner … another year on loan? If it didn’t work the first time, what makes United think it will work this time?

It’s about time United took a long hard look at the development strategy for players emerging from the academy.

Loan deals, with the odd exception, don’t seem to work. Keeping players at the club seems to be the better policy.

Let’s face it, the strategy has to change.

transfer rumours

What’s hot, what’s real and what’s not

In this section we look at some of the most active transfer stories of the week about United, both comings and goings. We give each story a fire rating (how hot the story is, out of five) and a star rating (how reliable the story is, out of five).

our top transfer tip

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Rated 4 out of 5

Adrien Rabiot (Juventus)

United have reportedly agreed a €17m fee with Juventus for Rabiot but personal terms are yet to be agreed with mummy agent Veronique.

John Murtough met with Mme Rabiot yesterday and transfer guru Fabrizio Romano reports that it was a productive meeting. United are said to want to close the deal within the week.

David Ornstein says United are yet to decide whether this is a Frenkie de Jong alternative, or as well as. Fans are underwhelmed either way.

🔥🔥🔥

Rated 4 out of 5

Frenkie de Jong (Barcelona)

The current Barcelona board are claiming the previous board made an illegal contract with De Jong. Well, that’s convenient, it means they don’t have to pay him his €17 million in deferred wages and they don’t have to pay him his current salary. Of course they probably won’t get away with it, but it could take years in court to resolve.

Barça have registered all new players except Koundé but to do that they must “reduce salary mass”, so they will still be pushing De Jong to de door.

Meanwhile United – and Chelsea – sit by and watch as the clock ticks by toward deadline day.

🔥🔥

Rated 3 out of 5

Cristiano Ronaldo (to any UCL side)

Sporting have now ruled themselves out of the Ronaldo race, which is now down to Saudi Arabia, Galatasaray or the MLS.

With none of those options appealing, it’s looking like CR7 may be staying at United through hobson’s choice, although with more than two weeks to go until the transfer window closes, we don’t expect this to just fizzle out without a last crescendo.

🔥🔥🔥🔥

Rated 4 out of 5

CODY gAKPO (PSV EINDHOVEN)

United seem to be finally putting some serious effort into improving their forward line and according to Sky Sports they are preparing a bid for €35m-rated Gakpo.

A left winger by trade – a position for which United arguably have plenty of options, he can also play up top and perhaps Ten Hag intends to convert him in Thierry Henry style.

PSV are reluctantly prepared to let him go if the price is right, which makes this one much more do-able than the likes of Antony and Sesko.

🔥

Rated 4 out of 5

Benjamin Sesko (Red Bull Salzburg)

Despite United having put a lot of effort into singing “the new Haaland”, especially with his agents, it looks like he’s going to be the new Haaland in more ways than one. Salzburg are reportedly going to sell him cheap to Red Bull club RB Leipzig in a year’s time, who will no doubt sell him to Borussia Dortmund, who will no doubt sell him to Manchester City.

The only glimmer of hope on this one is that the noise is all coming from the club so far, with the player yet to confirm his intention to toe the party line.

🔥

Rated 4 out of 5

Marko Arnautovic (Bologna)

Fans reacted so badly to the news that United had bid on Arnautovic, many due to the lack of ambition and some due to claims he is racist, that the club have withdrawn from the deal. That’s confirmed by all the big reporting guns.

The most underwhelming of transfer rumours since Joshua King, very reliable journalists – starting with Di Marzio – had reported that United had a bid in the €9 million region turned down by Bologna for the former West Ham and Stoke City man.

Well done United for listening to the fans.

Photo of the week: lessons

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The devil's advocate

“United will finish in the top four this season”

The case for ...

Part of the reason why Erik ten Hag was hired at Manchester United was his ability to draw more out of players than they previously produced. In fact, on arriving to Old Trafford, the Dutch manager, perhaps stupidly, stated the squad was a good one with lots of potential.

I understand fans have given up on the club behaving correctly or even seriously in the transfer market but even just putting that aside, United should make the top four. Even if we assume no one else is brought in this summer, Ten Hag should have enough to scrape into the Champions League.

Let’s talk about the underperforming players who are actually better than what their recent form suggests. We’ve got Anthony Martial, Marcus Rashford, Sancho, Bruno Fernandes, Donny van de Beek, Varane, Aaron Wan-Bissaka, Luke Shaw, Scott McTominay, and yes even Harry Maguire.

We’ve seen what Martial can do in the past and he’s done it long enough in a season to suggest it can be replicated. Yes, he’s had his injury troubles and apparent mood swings but it’s down to Ten Hag to extract the most out of the Frenchman.

Rashford may not turn out to be the world-class talent we all thought he once might be but he’s obviously better than he’s recently shown. Short of confidence and mentally burnt out, he’s another the former Ajax boss can get more out of.

Sancho seems to be finally settling in and might naturally get back to peak performance, even without Ten Hag’s help. And Bruno isn’t one who was in horrible form last season but we’ve certainly seen better from him. He’ll likely bounce back just from the improved tactical structure alone too.

Much has been made of Van de Beek and his former manager and even if he doesn’t light the league on fire, he’ll have the right circumstances to put in better performances this season too. Varane might not be the player he once was but he’s certainly better than what we’ve seen from him so far. And Ten Hag is expected to put an end to his injury issues, having already placed him under a specialised workout program.

Wan-Bissaka probably doesn’t have the tools for his new manager’s tactical preferences but his defensive prowess was highly praised before he was signed as well as after for two seasons before it all crumbled. Again, he won’t be the answer, but he has shown he’s better than the present moment. Shaw was flying not too long ago and simply suffered from exhaustion and the chaos we all experienced last season. Count him in among those who should get better under Ten Hag too.

McTominay clearly isn’t the world’s best midfielder and is probably suited to being a squad player at best but there was a time he was being praised for his tackling, aggression, and work-rate. What other manager can get the most out of him?Maguire might be an easy target and a popular player to criticise but he was one of the world’s most sought-after centre-backs at Leicester City and has been in good form for England. You’d bet on Ten Hag creating the same environment to get the defender back to his best, especially since he was praised and kept on as captain.

The last time United finished in 6th place was in the 18/19 season. And it’s safe to say this squad is miles better than that one. If Ole Gunnar Solskjaer could finish in a top-four spot in back to back seasons after that, Ten Hag should be able to aim for the same.

The case against...

Scott McTominay, Fred, Harry Maguire, David de Gea, Cristiano Ronaldo.

That’s the spine of the team that finished last season with 58 points, 13 behind fourth placed Tottenham (Tottenham!) and with as many goals conceded as relegated Burnley.

Guess what? Aside from probably losing the team’s top goalscorer, it is exactly the same spine of the team we will be seeing again this season.

We have a goalkeeper who won’t come off his line, a captain who doesn’t turn any faster than powdered milk, a midfield duo to make the Chuckle brothers blush and (for now) a striker so narcissistic that the only thing he’d pass to is a mirror.

What a lot of people don’t seem to realise is that the Premier League is hard. Bloody hard.

And as Gary Neville said after the Brighton defeat on Sunday, United are the easiest team to play against in the league. Even five-win Norwich came to Old Trafford a quarter ago and helped themselves to 15 shots, two goals and every chance of winning the game, but for Ronaldo fancying a hattrick that day.

Since then, the club have shifted eight first team players and received the princely sum of around £8m for the lot, covering about half the fee for Tyrell Malacia. The young Dutchman looks good, but improving your second choice left back is not a formula for success that I’ve ever heard of.

Add Lisandro Martinez to the mix and maybe you could expect a better defensive performance this outing, until you realise that he’s more than likely pushing four-time Champions League winner Raphael Varane out of the side – not exactly a step up in term of quality.

And sure, Christian Eriksen will spray around some nice passes – he’ll even do it as well as Paul Pogba with none of the drama. But how exactly is that going to get us into the top four? He can whip the corners in as well as he likes – it will still be Maguire heading them wide.

United have three weeks to add to a squad that many said would need three windows of surgery to sort out only a few short months ago. Every striker in world football seems to have moved this summer except, apparently, Marko Arnautovic. Meanwhile, if the Frenkie de Jong pursuit was pregnant it would be in its second trimester.

Even with those additions – even if they end up looking really good – are they really going to lift the quality of those around them? Will Scott McTominay start showing for the ball just because he sees a Dutchman do it up close?

So it seems to all be on the manager, then. The Erik ten Hag effect.

It will need to be quite some effect, given that Pep Guardiola was given eight first team signings and carte blanche to bin whoever he pleased just to finish three points clear of 5^th place in his first season in the Premier League. It wasn’t until they filled the squad with so many of his own £50m signings that the Bank of England considered printing a note for the amount, that City became truly comfortable in their Champions League qualifications.

Don’t get me wrong, preseason was fun, but it’s time for real talk now and this United team are just not at the same level as the London trio above us – never mind City and Liverpool.

newton heath

Classic United matches from yesteryear

12th April 1947: Brentford 0 – Manchester United 0

A draw in football is rarely enough for either side, and it proved insufficient again in a season of ups and downs for both clubs.

It may be fair to say that this encounter in first division football’s first post-war season wasn’t the most exciting, as England and the rest of Britain was getting back to business as normal after the end of World War 2.

A crowd of 22,035 at Brentford’s West London Griffin Park ground,saw their struggling idols grind out a goalless draw with the stars of Manchester United, captained by mercurial Irishman Johnny Carey, pictured above, in action during the game.

And as United were in a fight to win the league with rivals Wolverhampton Wanderers, Stoke City and eventual champions Liverpool, plucky Brentford were fighting their own battle.

Despite showing signs of being a side of quality players and exciting football, the Bee’s struggled to regain their positive post-war form and languished at the bottom of the table all season.

The Red Devils went on to narrowly miss out on top spot, finishing just a point behind Liverpool, so an extra point might have helped Brentford too, as they were relegated to Division 2.

And as United finished the season with a far superior goal difference, how they rued this result, which could have seen Matt Busby’s side clinch the league title for the fist time since 1911, before the First World War.

Ultimately, success wasn’t far away, with the Old Trafford faithful enjoying years of success and trophies, as the club went from strength to strength.

Brentford fans however suffered 64 years of bouncing around the lower leagues, playing in the old fourth division in 1998/99, when United were famously winning the treble.

But after years of investment, 2021 finally saw their return to the top flight, finishing 14th in their inaugural Premier League season, although United got the better of them in the corresponding fixture, winning 1-3 at the hosts’ brand new Community Stadium.

United line-up: Crompton, Aston, Carey, Chilton, Cockburn, Warner, Mitten, Burke, Rowley, Hanson, Pearson.

Paul Speller

RED billy

United bidding on Marko Arnautovic proves one thing once and for all

The first couple of years of Sir Alex Ferguson’s reign at Old Trafford were hardly anything to shout about, so I’m not going to get too upset about the start Erik ten Hag had on Sunday. Rome wasn’t built in a day and it’s better he sees what he’s up against sooner rather than later. What concerns me more – what concerns me a lot – is what’s happening on the transfer front.

Now, I’m writing this on Monday and a lot can happen between now and Saturday’s game, heck, we might even sign Adrien Rabiot, whoop whoop, but right now, there’s no Frenkie de Jong. If he’s going anywhere, it will be to Chelsea, so Ornstein says. There’s no Benjamin Sesko – likely to stay at Salzburg for another season, then go to Leipzig. There’s no Ibrahim Sangaré – just signed a new contract at PSV. There’s no Antony – too expensive. And there could be no Cristiano soon, if his wish to jump ship is granted.

But wait, what do we hear from Di Marzio? United have bid on a Serie A striker? That’s more like it! Who could it be? Lautaro Martinez, maybe, or Victor Osimhen? Rafael Leao?

No, none of the above. The player United have bid on is Marko Arnautovic. Marko bloody Arnautovic. Apologies to his mum, his wife, his pals, but with all due respect, what the absolute f*** have United become?

Everyone is drawing parallels with Odion Ighalo, signed at 11pm on deadline day after deals for the likes of, um, Joshua King fell through. But at least that was deadline day, at least it was just a loan, and at least Ighalo was, well Ighalo. We all loved him and he brought a smile to everyone’s faces. And that goal. Hero.

So that turned out all right, but United should still have learned from their mistakes. Over 30’s bargain basement panic buys have not worked well. We have a new manager building a new team. We have 20-odd days until deadline day this time, why are we doing this now? Because Ten Hag knows him? Do we even have scouts any more?

Aside from the underwhelming quality and the age issue, Arnautovic has been banned in the past for racist comments on the pitch – and has been accused of it a few times. Is this the kind of profile of player we want at Old Trafford? What the hell, why don’t we give Luis Suarez a call while we’re at it?

Remember Richard Arnold in the pub, saying “Get some f***ing players in. Money’s there, OK?… Money is not a consideration in who we want. It’s if the manager wants him, … if he’s a great player, and again is it 100, is it 200, get who you f***ing want”? Does anybody still believe that was a man telling the truth? Does anybody really believe John Murtough and Erik ten Hag have a blank cheque, and this is the best they can come up with?

The irony is, what Arnold said didn’t even have to be true. Just halfway toward being true would have done. Ten Hag looks like the kind of guy who can make a silk purse out of a sow’s ear. But give the guy a chance. Because we’re not just talking about an ear, here, are we?

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